bad modeling contest

I came across an advertisement in Stuff magazine (motto: we make Maxim look intellectual!) today. Stuff and Sony are doing a model search for a woman to play Queen Antonia from Everquest 2. As you might suspect for a queen, she's very young, very hot, and typically wears little more than a fancy bikini. So I browsed through the contest entries. They made every girl say why she wants to play the character, which was a cruel thing to do to the hopelessly dumb. The results were kind of amusing though. Here are some quotes from the entries:

Worst innuendo: I'd love to think of all the gamers out there playing with me as their character.

At least she's honest: With the right makeup, some blue contacts, and a padded bra, I think I could make a good Antonia.

Odd: all in all: tara = antonia = tara. that's all there is. that and i can kick your ass. cause i'm a ninja.

Gladiator: My name is Anna, but alot of people call me "Blade" from being one of the Swedish gladiators in the TV-show with the same name!

You entered a contest from Stuff magazine featuring a bikini clad babe who is very obviously in a video game for eye candy, and yet said this?

1) this is not my resume, this is my plea: That you would choose someone genuine. Someone who does not represent a product, someone who represents the joy of the game and the spirit of those who play it. I am Skarlett of Guk and I play every day.

2) Wholesome? I hope whoever wins is a wholesome girl that plays the game and loves it, not someone with fake boobs and no idea who Vox or Naggy are.

3) And next to a tiny bikini pic: I hate the idea of being taken for a pretty face. She's strength and power and beauty.

If the way the character is used in all their game advertisements, the fact that it's a Stuff magazine contest too, or at least the little animation on the contest home page didn't clue you in that genuine and wholesome isn't exactly the goal here, I'm afraid you're hopeless.

And finally: I would love to represent the company. I feel that I have a similar look & adequate experience as a model. I was Playmate of the Year 2004 & this month's cover model for Fitness Rx. Thank You! Carmella Yeah... it's her. Contest over. Though why she'd want to win this one, I'm not sure...

Espana

Now how do I get the ~ over the 'n' when I type? Eh, I don't know. But I'm leaving for Spain in less than 3 weeks!

Note to idiots

First, to the Muslims who are rioting because of a Newsweek story claiming that soldiers at Guantanimo Bay flushed a Koran down the toilet: What the hell is wrong with these people? At least sixteen people died in the riots in Afghanistan and violent riots swept through other Muslim countries as well. I guess now we don't even know if the original story was true. But that's not even my point. Let's say it was true. Some soldier ripped up a Koran and flushed it. That sucks. It's disrespectful. So complain about it. That's where it ends, you farking morons! Flushing a copy of a book, ANY BOOK, even your holy book or someone else's (e.g. the bible), is in no way on the same level as killing people! Furthermore, where are the riots against terrorist assholes hijacking Islam? Blowing up civilians in the name of Allah is infinitely worse than disrespecting one copy of a holy book, but we haven't seen any riots against Islamic terrorism. Those are some nice farking priorities these people have.

To far right wingers: You're idiots. You think you can do whatever you want after the Republicans scored such big victories in the 2004 elections, but many of us don't want your fundamentalist views imposed on us. You're alienating the moderates who voted Republican. Plan on winning anymore elections? Among other things, these people are why we can't get government funding for one of the biggest medical breakthroughs we'll ever see, stem cell research. To think Senator Frist use to be considered a moderate...

To far left wingers: You're idiots. You're hurting your own party. Beating a Republican party increasingly hijacked by the religious right should be easy. But because of some extremist morons, the left wing is painted as weak and worse, as populated by people who hate their own country. Those of you who really do hate this country and don't realize how good you have it here, despite our nation's problems, just get the hell out. Thanks. Oh, and twisting the truth so far that you're basically lying doesn't help your party in the long run, Michael Moore.

More idiocy from schools

In school administrative stupidity, a student was arrested for having a handful of 3 ½ nails in his pocket. Yes, the student was caught with the nails and police were brought in to protect the student body from this dangerous boy! He could poke someone’s eye out! I say they give him the chair. The nails were apparently absentmindedly left in the kid’s pocket after a boy scout camping trip. The school’s principle was unavailable for comment as his head was so far up his ass he couldn’t hear the questions. All reporters could make out was some mumbling about “zero tolerance” coming from the administrator’s nether region. In related news students will no longer be allowed to carry pens and pencils. The deadly writing instruments will be securely locked away in the classroom at the end of each period. Any student found in possession of pens or pencils will be tasered. Twice.

At another public school, an administrator has objected because an e-mail was sent on the school network with the big bad “God” word in it (4th story down). The admin said such an e-mail has no place on the school network. It was an e-mail for members of Fellowship of Christian Athletes, you retard! Now a religious group at the school whose membership is entirely voluntary can’t even use the e-mail system? Are you freaking nuts? What does it matter? Let the Christian group use it. Let the Muslim group use it. Let the Buddhist group use it. Hell, let the scientologist group use it, but be sure to kick their members in the nuts for being so stupid as to join that money hungry science fiction cult.

In Kansas they’re having hearings about whether Intelligent Design should be taught alongside evolution in the public schools. Ridiculous. What I’d like to hear from the scientists, and I haven’t yet, is that in a school science curriculum you don’t teach every hypothesis that comes along and is advocated by a small group of scientists. You teach from the body of established scientific knowledge that has wide acceptance in the community. The intelligent design advocates want us to think that the scientific community is sharply divided over whether or not evolution is a valid theory, as though it’s a 50/50 debate for and against. The truth is it’s more like a 99/1 for and against debate in the relevant fields of science. You do not teach the 1% view in a school science curriculum. The evolution critics, despite their refusal to admit it, want their side taught for one simple reason. It agrees with their religious views.

Like everyone else, I can't help but wonder what Pink Floyd thinks of all this education related nonsense, but they won't return my calls.

Rough week for amphibians

No new entries in awhile... I don't have any good excuses. I'll work on that.

Weird news? Well last week the story of the exploding toads came out. By Thursday scientists had a guess as to what's causing this amphibious assplosion. If you said it's because crows are pecking out the toads' livers, the toads are puffing themselves up as a defense mechanism, and without a liver the blood vessals and lungs burst and the other organs ooze out the bird pecked hole, you win!

In other croaking related news, some endangered frogs were saved from becoming tastey aphrodisiac shakes in Peru. Yes, the locals think sucking down a liquified froggy will make someone horny. Haven't they heard of Viagra?



Unavailable for comment.

In personal news, I still haven't officially booked my vacation. The plan right now though Spain, particularly Ibiza, in June. The flights, tour, and hotels are pretty well picked out. It's just really farking expensive. Then in August I'm planning to do a weekend caving expedition at Wyandotte and Marengo Caves in southern Indiana.